Unleash Your Best Self: A Conversation with Dr. Michelle Maidenberg
The Life Unscripted Podcast with Rosabel Zohfeld
Meet Dr. Michelle Maidenberg
Psychologist & Therapist: Specializing in CBT, ACT, EMDR, polyvagal theory, and mindfulness.
NYU Instructor: Teaches graduate courses in mindfulness practice.
Founder of “Through My Eyes”: A nonprofit providing free, clinically guided videotaping for chronically ill individuals to leave a legacy for loved ones.
Author: ACE Your Life: Unleash Your Best Self and Live the Life You Want; narrator of its audiobook version.
The ACE Method: Acceptance • Compassion • Empowerment
Michelle’s signature framework breaks down into three pillars:
- Acceptance – Acknowledge what is beyond your control and lean into reality without judgment.
- Compassion – Offer kindness and understanding to yourself, especially in moments of struggle.
- Empowerment – Commit to behaviors aligned with your deepest values, allowing you to shape your own path.
Facing Emotional Avoidance
Our brains are wired to protect us from discomfort, which often leads to avoiding negative emotions. Michelle explains:
- Why We Avoid: A primitive “protector” part of our brain minimizes pain by distracting us or rationalizing away our feelings.
- The Cost of Avoidance: When we sidestep sadness, anger, or frustration, we also block growth, connection, and the very values those emotions point to.
- A Mindful Alternative: Notice when you’re activating avoidance strategies. Pause, breathe, and make a conscious choice to sit with your experience—then use self-compassion to support yourself through it.
Discovering & Aligning Your Core Values
Values are a guide to action, yet many of us confuse them with goals or external expectations. Michelle walks us through:
- Identifying Your Values: Use online exercises or card-sorting tools to unearth what truly matters to you—be it integrity, creativity, connection, or something else.
- Defining & Embodying Them: Clarify what each value means in your life and list daily behaviors that honor it.
- Navigating Value Conflicts: When two important values clash (e.g., work ethic vs. self-care), recognize the tension, honor both equally, and choose the path that aligns most with your overarching purpose in that moment.
Living Intentionally in a Fast-Paced World
From the rapid-fire changes of technology to the swirl of social media, life today can feel dysregulating. Michelle reminds us:
- Embrace Discomfort: Growth happens when we allow ourselves to do hard things, knowing that struggle is temporary and valuable.
- Stay Grounded: Regular mindfulness practices—like the guided meditations on Michelle’s YouTube channel—help anchor us amid constant change.
- Cultivate Gratitude: Reflect daily on small wins and the ways you lived in alignment with your values.
Key Takeaways
- Acceptance, Compassion, Empowerment form a roadmap to resilience.
- Emotional avoidance may feel protective but ultimately stalls personal growth.
- Core values drive our behavior; clarifying them transforms decision-making.
- Mindful living and self-compassion are essential in our fast-moving world.